• Gisèle Schembri

Friends - With 'Benefits'?!

I am not a prude. Far from it, especially considering how phenomenally prudish my family are. However there are some things that I feel just make no sense and one of them is the ever-popular ‘Friends with Benefits’ idea.

I struggle to see the point of hooking up with someone repeatedly enough that it can only mean you like them, yet keep them at arm’s length enough to call them ‘just a friend’. Honestly, the term 'benefits' does not even make sense in this context! What benefit is it exactly to fall in love with someone knowing full well they have no intention of being in a relationship with you? And if you yourself have no intention of being an integral part of their life, then what ‘benefit’ is it to be sleeping with someone you clearly don’t care enough about? Don’t give me crap about attraction. For it is proven that since we are energetic beings, we will only ever see our own perception of the other person, and this means that we would not find someone attractive unless we actually liked their energy. Which brings me back to the only three possibilities for anyone to ever be willing to have what is being termed a FWB:

1 - They are either in that class of human that still cannot control their animal instincts and therefore would have sex even with someone they don’t even like.

2 - They don’t believe they are worthy of someone actually loving them.

3 - They are wimps, so drawn into current society with its very obvious messed up ways that they are at this point unable to man up/be woman enough to admit to real feelings or committing to anyone out of fear.

I rather think the last one is the one that hits home for most. So maybe, just maybe, even as you fume indignantly at my bluntness in this post, you should have a look at just why you would ever be willing to give/get less than what any human deserves.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay


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